


Marry Me

by theEscapade



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Emotions, Endgame, Everyone Is Alive, F/F, F/M, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Laurel Lance is Alive, Longbow Hunters, Lost Love, M/M, Nyssara, Oliver Queen Being an Asshole, Regret, Reunions, Sexual Tension, Some Humor, Tommy Merlyn is Alive, Weddings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-01
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-05-16 19:33:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14817554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theEscapade/pseuds/theEscapade
Summary: It's Sara and Ava's wedding day. Everything is going well until Sara spots someone in particular standing in the back.(Slight AU: Laurel and Tommy are alive and married. Laurel is still the Black Canary. Ricardo Diaz is dead. Oliver never got outed as the Green Arrow and never was arrested.)





	1. Wedding Day

**Author's Note:**

> I was shuffling through my music when Marry Me by Thomas Rhett came on and I just felt compelled to start writing this.

“Oh, Sara, I can’t believe you’re getting married!” Dinah exclaims. “My baby is getting married!”

  
  


Sara laughs and hugs her mother, but then a mournful look wipes across her face. “I wish Daddy could be here.”

  
  


“I know, sweetheart, I miss him too. But I know he would be thrilled to know you’ve finally found that special someone.”

  
  


“Yea, I guess.” Sara says, handing her mother the invite card with the date and time on the front.

  
  


“And by the way, I invited a few of your old friends from Star City if you don’t mind.”

  
  


“Not at all. Just don’t wear white, that’s my color now.”

  
  


* * *

 

  


“Sara, are you almost done in there?” asks Oliver, peeking his head in through the doorway of her dressing room.

  
  


“Yea, just give me a second.” Sara responds, swiping a mascara brush along her lashes one last time.

  
  


“I don’t get why women wear so much makeup.” he says, stepping into the room.

  
  


She laughs, “Of course you don’t.”

  
  


She puts the wand back in the tube, sets it down on the table, gives herself one more look in the mirror, then heads out the door.

  
  


* * *

 

  


“You ready?” Oliver asks, putting a hand on her shoulder.

  
  


“As ever.”

  
  


They put their arms around each other, and begin their walk.

  
  


Sara sees nothing but smiles and cameras pointed towards her as she walks down the aisle. Her ears are filled with the sound of a piano and violins as they make their way, flower petals falling around them in the breeze.

  
  


Then she looks straight ahead. She sees the woman she loves standing under an arch covered in white and pink flowers. Their eyes lock, sky blue meets smoky grey.

  
  


As they near the end of the aisle, Oliver removes his arm from around Sara’s. She steps up onto the podium and hands Felicity, the maid of honor, her bouquet. The music dies down, and now the air is filled with the sounds of waves crashing on the beach below.

  
  


“Ladies and gentlemen, family and friends, we have gathered here today to celebrate the union of Sara Lance and Ava Sharpe…”

  
  


As the minister goes on about love and peace and happiness, the two get lost in each other's eyes, hand holding tightly to one another’s. They watch each other intently as the ocean winds catch strands of hair, blowing them in the breeze.

  
  


“...before we begin the ceremony, I ask our soon to be partners in life to take a look at all who have come to observe the joining of these two souls.”

  
  


Their eyes disconnect as they turn their heads to the crowd. Ava gives a smile to Rip, Gary, and the Legends team, before looking back to see Sara facing the crowd, an odd look on her face.

  
  


The moment Sara shifted her gaze towards the large array of people, half of which she had never met, her eyes caught a figure standing in the very back. A woman in a midnight blue dress, dark brown hair flowing in a gust of wind, an afflicted smile on her face.

  
  


She didn’t even notice when the priest stopped talking and people’s heads turned to see what she was looking at. She didn’t even notice how her hands slowly fell from Ava’s loosening grip.

  
  


Murmurs sprung up in the crowd. Sara frantically looked back and forth between the faces of the woman she was about to marry and the one she never forgot about.

  
  


“Sara, what’s going on?” Ava asked, unable to figure out who or what Sara was looking at.

  
  


The minister spoke up, “Is there something wrong?”

  
  


Sara looked back at the preacher and then at Ava, “No, it’s just- I’m sorry, I can’t do this.”

  
  


They all watched on as Sara ran back down the aisle, veil flying off behind her and landing on the pathway, eyes glued on Nyssa the whole time.


	2. Mistakes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took some inspiration from the Marry Me music video and Max & Naomi from 90210 for this chapter... Enjoy!

She runs until she makes it back to her dressing room, slamming the door behind her and falling to the floor.

  


“Sara, wait!” Oliver yells after her.

  


He bursts into the room, sees her on the ground disheveled, then quietly closes the door.

  


“What’s wrong? Why did you leave?” he asks, sitting down next to her and placing a hand on her shoulder.

  


Sara remains quiet, eyes becoming watery as a tear finds its way down her cheek.

  


“We can go back out there if you want.”

  


“No… I can’t.” she responds, staring down at the floor.

  


“Why not? What were you looking at in the crowd?”

  


“My mom said she invited some _old friends_.”

  


“Who did she… oh.” he says, finally realizing what, or who, Sara saw in the crowd of people. “Are you mad at her for bringing Nyssa?”

  


Sara’s heart seemed to skip a beat at hearing her name said out loud for the first time in years. “No. No, I’m not mad, I guess… I just never thought I’d see her again.”

  


* * *

 

  


Ava didn’t move from her spot, ignoring the whispers from the audience as she searched through the mass of people, still confused as to what exactly Sara was looking at that made her change her mind so suddenly.

  


The minister stepped towards her and tapped her arm, “I do not believe she is coming back, miss. Should we call it of for now?”

  


“No. Just give me a minute, I’ll be right back.” Ava said, stepping down from the podium and walking back down the path, now fully aware of the stares coming from all directions.

  


As she neared the last few rows of Sara’s friends and relatives, she saw an oddly familiar face looking upset and standing next to the girl she recognized as Thea Queen. Unable to put a name to the figure, she hurried over to Sara’s dressing room to see Oliver waiting outside.

  


It was then that she remembered. Several months back while waiting in Sara’s quarters for the Legends to return from a mission, she noticed a small box open on her desk. Inside was a stack of photos, some of which had pictures of Sara and her friends and family, including Oliver. However, most of them contained just two people: Sara and a beautiful woman with dark brown hair.

  


“Is she in there?” Ava asked Oliver.

  


“Yes, but you might want to give her a minute.” he responded.

  


“Did she tell you what’s wrong?” she asked suspiciously.

  


“I’m sorry, but that’s not for me to tell you.”

  


“It’s that woman, isn’t it.”

  


Oliver sighed, “Nyssa. Sara didn’t know she was coming.”

 

 

"Can you go check on her and make sure she's okay?"

 

 

"Yea." Oliver replied. He gave a light knock on the door before slowly turning the handle and stepping into the room. As he looked inside, he saw an open window and an empty room.

 

 

Instead of telling Ava, he shut the door behind him and ran over to the window, squeezing through the small opening and jumping down onto the pavement below.

  


* * *

 

  


Thea turned and looked at Nyssa, “She was looking at you, you know.”

  


“I am aware.”

 

Some of the members of Team Arrow along with Sara’s mother turned to look at Nyssa, suspecting it was her who had caught Sara’s eye.

  


“You should go find her.”

  


“I do not wish to interrupt any further. Sara had always dreamed of this day.” said Nyssa.

  


“But she probably always thought of standing across from you up there.” said Thea as she nodded towards the podium.

  


Nyssa did not respond this time. Instead, she took one more glance around to see the entire crowd looking directly at her before rushing off back to the parking lot. She had driven here with Oliver and Felicity, and instead she found an empty bench near the edge of the tree line and sat down, angry at herself for ruining the day she knew Sara had been waiting her entire life for. She became lost in thought before she noticed a white dress out of the corner of her eye.

 

 

Looking up, she saw Sara with makeup running down her face. In a quiet voice, she asked, "Can I sit?"

 

 

"Of course." Nyssa answered, sliding over to give Sara room on the small wooden bench.

 

 

"What happens now?"

 

 

"No one has left yet, I'm sure you may still continue with the wedding."

 

 

"But what about Ava?" she asked, finally able to meet Nyssa's eyes.

 

 

"I do not believe Ava would mind if you returned. From what your mother has told me, she seems like a wonderful person who loves you very much."

 

 

"Yea."

 

 

"I can see why you're marrying  _her_." Nyssa did not intend to add the emphasis when she mentioned Ava, but it somehow came out that way. "My mother always told me that when you are with the right person, there is no need to second guess yourself, as you simply know.”

 

 

After a moment of what felt like everlasting silence, Sara looked over to Nyssa, "I don't know."

 

 

Nyssa remained quiet, a perplexed look on her face.

 

 

"We only got together five months ago. What if we're moving too fast?"

 

 

Nyssa's expression did not change as she scrambled for words. She searched her brain for an answer that could explain how she was feeling without giving away too much. 

 

 

Sara's eyes began to tear up again, "What do you think? I mean, you know me... you always did. Am I making a mistake?"

 

 

Just as Nyssa had finally found the words to say, they heard footsteps on the pavement fast approaching.

 

 

"Sara, Ava's waiting for you back in your dressing room. We can call it off for today and reschedule for next week, I'd be happy to cover the costs." said Oliver, standing in front of the two. "Nyssa, Felicity's waiting in the car if you want to head out."

 

 

Sara slowly stood up as she wiped the tears from her face. She turned and gave Nyssa one last glance before walking off back towards the ceremony.

 

 

After she was out of sight, Nyssa followed Oliver over to the car. Once they had returned to their home, where she had been staying for the weekend, Oliver went of to spend some time with William, leaving just Nyssa and Felicity in the living room.

 

 

"That was a mess, huh?" Felicity asked.

 

 

"That is one way to describe it." said Nyssa as she sat on the couch and took a sip of the tea Felicity had made her.

 

 

"So what were you and Sara doing all the way over in the park? I mean, I'm not saying you guys were doing anything bad, because that would be bad, but-"

 

 

"We were merely having a conversation." said Nyssa, chuckling at Felicity's tendency to ramble on before her expression turned solemn again, remembering what exactly the conversation was about.

 

 

"What'd she say? Did she tell you why she ran off like that?"

 

 

"Sara left the podium when she noticed I was there, as her mother invited had me without informing her.” Nyssa then took a long pause before speaking up again; “She asked me if she was making a mistake.”

 

 

"Woah. So what did you end up telling her?"

 

 

"I did not have the opportunity to respond as that was the moment Oliver showed up looking for her.”

 

 

Felicity suddenly pulled her phone from her purse, "Do you want to call her? She ended up getting a new phone number after she, you know, died."

 

 

Nyssa winced at the mention of Sara's death, "Thank you, Felicity, but I would rather not cause any more disruptions while I am here."

 

 

 


	3. Honesty

“Sara, what was that up there?” Ava asked, throwing her hands in the air. She was standing just outside the dressing room after realizing Oliver tricked her.

  
  
  


Sara slowly walked forward, watery eyes staring hard at the pavement. “I’m so sorry, it’s just… my mom brought in some people from out of town. I didn’t know they were coming and it just took me by surprise.” 

  
  
  


“You mean  _ she  _ took you by surprise?” 

  
  
  


“I- I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  
  
  


“Nyssa?” Ava’s patience had been tested far too many times for her to let Sara act like nothing was wrong.

  
  
  


“Who-”

  
  
  


“Your friend Oliver told me after you  _ ran away _ .”

  
  
  


Sara stomped her foot on the ground and muttered to herself; “I can’t believe he would do that.”

  
  
  


“Just like I can’t believe you wouldn’t tell me about her. I saw those pictures in that box on your desk, why did you never say anything?”

  
  
  


“You went through my desk?!” Sara asked through clenched teeth.

  
  
  


“Yes, Sara! That’s what marriage is about - being honest and knowing about each other's past and still accepting them anyways.” Ava stood stunned and wondering if it was something she had done or something Nyssa had done.

  
  
  


“I was gonna tell you!”

  
  
  


Ava rolled her eyes; “When? After we had already spent five months together and gotten married?!”

  
  
  


“Yes! Well, no! I don’t know, Ava, okay?”

  
  
  


“You know what? Figure this out for yourself.” said Ava, tossing Sara the keys to their car. “I’ll take a cab.”

  
  
  


Ava then walked away back to the parking lot, head shaking and tears threatening to find their way out of her eyes, leaving Sara alone on the sidewalk.

  
  
  


Sara simply stood there unable to move or call after her. She felt shocked, angry, and an entire mix of emotions, but somewhere in there was the odd sense of  _ relief. _ She made her way back to her car and got inside, reaching for her phone to pull up the directions to the Queen’s penthouse.

  
  
  


* * *

 

  
  
  


Felicity answered the door when she knocked. She was in pajamas and her glasses were nowhere to be found, showing she was just about to go to bed before Sara came to the door.

  
  
  


“Sara, is there something wrong? Should I get Oliver? He hasn’t gone to sleep yet if you need anything. Here, come inside.”

  
  
  


Felicity opened the door wider and Sara stepped in. She took a glance around the living room to find it empty.

  
  
  


“No, everything’s fine. Is Nyssa here?”

  
  
  


“She’s staying in the guest room.” said Felicity, pointing towards a closed door near just down the hall. “But I think she’s asleep already.”

  
  
  


Felicity began walking over to the couch as Sara followed behind her. She moved some pillows out of the way before taking a seat.

  
  
  


Sara flopped down on the couch and shook her head before asking; “What am I supposed to do now?”

  
  
  


“Well, did Ava say anything to you after we left?”

  
  
  


“Yea, but we got in a pretty big fight. I came here right after it happened because I just didn’t know where else to go.”

  
  
  


“Is the wedding still on?”

  
  
  


“Honestly, I don’t know. Ava told me I had to ‘figure this out for myself’ and then she just took a cab to God knows where.”

  
  
  


Suddenly, Felicity sprang up and ran over to the kitchen table. She came back and sat down again, handing Sara a sealed envelope with her name on the front. “Nyssa left you this letter, she told me to give it to you if you stopped by or if she had already left.”

  
  
  


“Left? What do you mean she's leaving?” Sara asked, hints fear finding their way into her voice.

  
  
  


“She said something about not wanting to ‘cause any more disruptions’.”

  
  
  


Sara immediately stood back up from the couch and started walking over to the guest room where Nyssa was sleeping.

  
  
  


Felicity ran after her the second the realized where she was headed; “Sara, wait.” she said in a demanding tone.

  
  
  


More tears began finding a path down Sara’s face as she said through quivering lips ;“I need to talk to her.” 

  
  
  


“Just read the letter first. I don’t know what’s in it but she spent like an hour writing it so I think it’s best you hear what she has to say before you do anything.”

  
  
  


“Fine.”

  
  
  


Felicity grabbed Sara’s arm and walked her back to the the front door. “I’ll take you home because you definitely are not in any shape to be driving right now.” She could smell the liquor on Sara’s breath from a mile away.

  
  
  


Sara simply nodded and followed Felicity out the door, her hands in a death grip around the envelope.

  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


 

After taking a short nap in the car ride and gulping down the the glass of water Felicity made her drink, Sara returned to the bedroom in the honeymoon suite her and Ava had reserved for the weekend. Ava was nowhere to be found, and there were no signs of her having been there since they left that morning.

  
  
  


Sara threw her dress in the back of the closet, not wanting to be reminded of any of today’s events. She grabbed the flask of rum she had in her bag, deciding there was no way she could read Nyssa’s letter sober. She took a sip of her drink, sat down on the bed, and ripped open the envelope. She wished she had chosen to fill her flask with straight vodka when she began reading.

  
  
  


_ I remember my father telling me that one day you will catch yourself wishing the person you loved had never existed so you’d be spared your pain. That is one of the few things he had ever said to me that was not entirely false. I often find myself wishing I had simply returned you to Starling City, to your family and your friends who could have loved you and protected you better than I had. Furthermore, I frequently wish that the League still existed and my father was alive, so that I could have a purpose in this world other than waiting for you to return to me, or in other words, hoping for an extremely doubtful scenario. However, I do not dwell on those thoughts for long. If I had realized how truly undecided you were when you told me you would train with the League and sent you back here, I would not have known what it meant to love another. I would never have learned that everything my father stood for, everything I had lived my entire life yearning to be a part of, was misguided and built on false claims. You taught me what it meant to care for someone other than myself. You showed me the strength of love, not only in the way I loved you, but in the way you loved your family unconditionally, and how you set yourself up for what should have been certain death simply to assure yourself that they had survived and were alright. The way you loved everything on this earth so purely and graciously, the way you loved yourself enough to never stop fighting for what you believed was right, and the way you once loved me in spite of all my mistakes and all the ways I hurt you. If our time together did not exist, neither would my belief in true justice and the value of human life. The pain of losing you is greatly outweighed by the light you brought me. You taught me how to trust another, how to fight for something other than the will of the League, and for that I will be eternally grateful. No matter who you love, no matter where you go, and no matter what you do, I will always love you with every last piece of me. I do not wish I had never met you, I only wish that you let me go so you will be spared the pain I’ve endured. _

  
  
  


She downed the whole glass in between sentences, opting to take short breaks throughout to continue refilling her glass with something stronger each time. The pages were littered with teardrops, smearing the ink into nothing more than a blur, as if she were trying to erase the words on the page and make herself believe they were never there.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 **Notes** **:** ****I was watching Batman Begins the other day and Ra's al Ghul told Bruce[this](https://qph.fs.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-b08c55f4c0ec668ac98ba92a3b55a5d2) and even though it's from another universe, I thought it applied to what Nyssa must be feeling. Thanks for reading!


	4. Red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to say I've been really busy recently and that's why I haven't posted but in reality I've just been binge watching Arrow for the fourth time over. I am very sorry for the wait, but I have already started next chapter so hopefully I'll have that out as soon as possible!
> 
>  
> 
> (Note: I've made this story take place in a bit of an AU, so now Laurel and Tommy are still alive and married, Ricardo Diaz is dead, and Oliver never got outed as the Green Arrow and went to prison. Laurel is also still the Black Canary.)

The morning sun crept through the windows as Sara’s eyes slowly opened. Her head was pounding as she sat up in bed, the world spinning around her. She stumbled over toward the table and reached for her phone before typing in a familiar address and hitting send.

  
  
  


Nyssa woke up in the same state on the opposite side of town, though it wasn’t the sun that pulled her out of her slumber, it was the sound of her ringtone. She rolled over in the bed, stains of liquor on the white sheets, and saw a text from a number she recognized: Sara.

  
  
  


_ 4801 Melville Street. 11:00 PM. _

  
  
  


Nyssa checked the time on the clock and saw that it was already mid morning. She heard noises coming from outside the door to the bedroom, forks scraping on plates and footsteps across the kitchen floor. She slowly stood up, stumbling and catching herself, then made her way over to where Oliver, Felicity, and William were eating. 

  
  
  


Felicity turned when she noticed the woman behind her; “Morning, Nyssa.”

  
  
  


Oliver and William gave her a smile and offered her a seat. Nyssa sat down at the place they had set for her. She began eating the eggs they had put on her plate, when Oliver spoke up.

  
  
  


“Felicity and I are going to head over to the foundry in a bit. We could really use your help, if you’re up for it.”

  
  
  


“I am still in practice, if that is what you are asking. I figure the Longbow Hunters have returned?”

  
  
  


“Yea. And something tells me they’ll be making an appearance soon.”

  
  
  


“I don’t suppose you have an extra bow laying around?”

  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


“I see you have made some improvements since the last time I was here.” said Nyssa as she stepped out from the elevator and looked around the lair.

  
  
  


Felicity walked in behind her and made her way over to her computer station. “Well, after Diaz set the place on fire we had to do a bit of redecorating.”

  
  
  


Nyssa walked over to the large display of cases holding the suits of Team Arrow’s members. She noticed the costumes of Wild Dog and Mr. Terrific, before seeing the uniform of the new Black Canary. Her eyes lingered on it, remembering a time when it was Sara who wore it.

  
  
  


As she turned back toward the center of the room, she saw Oliver walking towards her with two bows and a quiver in hand. He had a quiver filled with his signature green-tipped arrows on his back, and handed her one with the same coloring.

  
  
  


“You up for a challenge?”

  
  
  


Nyssa nodded, put the quiver on her back, and followed Oliver over to the new archery range they built after the fire. The two of them reached back for an arrow and drew back their bows. Felicity pressed a button, and suddenly a dozen tennis balls were bouncing forty feet in front of them.

  
  
  


Oliver shot six arrows in rapid succession. Nyssa did the same, only with five.

  
  
  


“Looks like we have a winner!” Oliver said as he pointed to himself, noting how Nyssa shot one less arrow than him and assuming she had missed.

  
  
  


Nyssa smiled deviously and walked over to the wall. “Is that so?”

  
  
  


She pointed to the arrow stuck in the wall with not one but two tennis balls wrapped around the shaft. Felicity stood in the back trying to hide the laugh that escaped her lips. Oliver turned, giving her a sarcastic glare.

  
  
  


“Looks like Thea and Roy didn’t keep you from working on your skills, after all.” he said with a smile. “You can paint those arrowheads red, if you want.”

  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Several hours later, Sara entered the lair to find Oliver, Felicity, and Laurel staring at a computer screen. They all turned simultaneously when they heard the elevator doors slide open, each one of them giving her the same concerned look.

  
  
  


Felicity leaned back in her chair and changed her disconcerting expression into a smile. “Hi, Sara.”

  
  
  


Sara made her way up the stairs to the platform. “Hey.” She looked at the screen and saw a map of the city on the display. “What are you guys looking at?”

  
  
  


“We’re trying to figure out where the Longbow Hunters are planning to hit next.” said Oliver.

  
  
  


Felicity bagan typing away at her keyboard again and pulled up several bank statements of some of Star City’s most powerful figures. “They’ve started putting millions of dollars into the bank accounts of corrupt businessmen and crime bosses. I’m trying to find where they’re getting all this money from.”

  
  
  


Felicity rambled on about complicated computer terms until she finally said something everyone else in the room could understand. “Star City National Bank account 1141. Why does that sound so familiar?”

  
  
  


Oliver quickly ran over to the computer to see what Felicity had found. “That’s the account I used when I took the $40 million from Adam Hunt seven years ago.”

  
  
  


“Does that mean…”, Felicity stammered.

  
  
  


“They’ve been tracking us for years.”, said Oliver, finishing her sentence

  
  
  


“That still doesn’t explain where they got the money from in the first place.”

  
  
  


“That’s not important right now. First, we need to figure out how they’re getting all this information.”

  
  
  


Felicity got lost in her hacking again and Oliver stormed off, leaving just Sara and Laurel. 

  
  
  


“How’s the new Black Canary?”, Sara asked as her and Laurel walked over to another part of the lair. 

  
  
  


Laurel laughed, “It’s not easy, but it’s all worth it. I’m just trying to live up to the old one.”

  
  
  


Sara smiled in return, and the two took a seat on one of the cabinets holding their battle gear.

  
  
  


Laurel’s expression then turned serious, “How are you doing?”

  
  
  


Sara sighed, not wanting to remember yesterday’s events. “I’m fine.”

  
  
  


“Sara, I have some experience with heartbreak and I can tell that you are definitely not fine.”

  
  
  


They sat in a deafening silence as Sara stared across the room. The freshly painted red-tipped arrows laying on a table caught her eye, and she found herself unable to look away. “How do you know?” she asked in a quiet voice.

  
  
  


“How do you know what?”

  
  
  


“When you’re still in love?” Sara muttered, now gazing at the compound bow sitting next to the arrows with more hints of red on the limbs.

  
  
  


Laurel closed her eyes, remembering a time when she denied her love for both Oliver and Tommy. 

  
  
  


“When you look for them in a crowded room. When you think of them in the most unexpected ways at the most unexpected times. When they cross your mind and you try so hard to put them out, but you can’t, so you just let them stay there. When you tell yourself that you’re not but deep down you don’t really believe it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The synopsis for Season 7 of Arrow was released and it said that the new villain will be trying to unravel all of Oliver's work as the Green Arrow, and there is a lot of talk about the Longbow Hunters making an appearance next season, so I'm sort of implementing that story line.
> 
>  
> 
> Also, I wrote that last paragraph by Laurel when I was in a *very emotional* state a few weeks ago and I thought I'd put it into the story because it fit so well. Next chapter is going to be very steamy and sad just a warning.


	5. Choices

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nyssa and Sara meet up and discuss their memories and regrets.

Nyssa closed her book and checked the clock sitting on the table. It was 10:59, nearly time for her to head over to the address Sara had sent her that morning. Oliver, Felicity, and William were watching the Rockets playoff game on the television, and she waved goodbye to them before grabbing her jacket from the coat hangers by the door. She did not tell them where she was going, but they each had an idea.

 

Nyssa stepped into the elevator, counting each floor as the numbers above the doors ticked down to one. She walked out into the lobby. It was eerily quiet and empty except for a single clerk at the desk. Nyssa did not remember seeing him earlier, as Felicity had excitedly introduced her to most of the staff in their apartment building the day before.

 

The parking lot was just as silent, if not more. She pressed the unlock button on her car and saw the red lights flashing to her left. Nyssa got inside, turned on the engine, and drove out of the parking lot. The League had millions of dollars in assets and untraceable accounts that had all been left in her name, so she only found it fitting to use them to buy whatever she pleased and live her life as she had always wanted to since she met Sara.

 

Nyssa bought a dark gray Porsche Panamera convertible, nearly identical to the one Sara had pointed out to her on a mission in Los Angeles. She remembered the look on Sara’s face and the way her eyes lit up at the sight of a material thing as she sped onto the freeway. The street lights lit up the road in front of her as she felt the wind rush past her face. Sara had always been able to find joy and happiness in the simplest things, something Nyssa both loved and envied at the same time.

 

She drove onto the exit ramp and quickly arrived at her desired location. Nyssa turned into the parking lot packed with cars, all of them nearly as expensive as her own. The address was the only thing Sara had to send her, as she knew exactly where to go.

 

Nyssa headed over to one of the side doors of the large building in front of her and quietly picked the lock. She entered the stairwell on her right and climbed up all fifty-seven stories until she reached the roof. Stepping out on the roof, she saw Sara sitting on the edge of the building, legs dangling over the side, staring at the city lights laid out before her.

 

Sara heard the click of the door opening and slow footsteps behind her. She turned and looked at Nyssa, a soft smile on her face. “Nice car.”

 

Nyssa quietly laughed and sat down on the ledge next to Sara. She noticed how the moon casted a soft glow on her hair, making it look like gold and silver intertwined.

 

“So you’re helping Oliver with the Longbow Hunters?” Sara asked.

 

“Yes. Although I have dedicated my life to righting the wrongs done by my father, I see assisting Oliver and his team as yet another way to do so.” said Nyssa, looking down at the silhouette of a car entering the parking lot below her feet.

 

“It’s not your fault, you know. The things he did, and the things he made you do.”

 

“My father did not force me into his work, I chose to see his will done. I do not regret anything I did within the League, I simply wish I had done what I desired rather than what he wanted me to do.”

 

Sara slid closer to Nyssa, just enough that their arms were gently touching. “You fought back in the end. You disbanded the League, and now you’re choosing your own fate.” She took Nyssa’s hand in her own and looked directly into her eyes. They looked darker now, with nothing but distant lights to illuminate them, and more despair than she had ever seen showing through her face.

 

They sat there in silence for what felt like forever. The same forever they had promised each other so long ago. The same promise they had broken countless times.

 

Sara spoke up now, quieter than before, only loud enough for Nyssa to hear. “Do you remember when we found this place?”

 

“I remember everything.” said Nyssa, with a small smile on her face.

 

Sara looked down at the light reaching through the windows of the apartments below them. “You were telling me how me being in your life changed your entire perspective, and I said we should run away together. We had our backs packed and hidden in the catacombs below the mountain. I was so nervous we were going to get caught, so I went outside in the middle of the night to calm myself down. Talibah was out there, and we talked for a while about the stars, the recruits, but mostly about you. That’s when she mentioned the Undertaking in Star City. I told her I was tired, and that I was heading back to our quarters. I was so in shock, and still so nervous that when I made it to the crossroads, I turned left toward the catacombs instead of going right back to you. I grabbed my bag, took out a pen and paper, and wrote you a letter explaining why I was leaving, why I had to go, but I just couldn’t bring myself to say goodbye. It was just too hard, so I shoved the note into my pocket and ran. When I made it out of the caves, I looked back towards our quarters and saw light coming from the window. I knew you were awake, I knew you were looking for me, but I just couldn’t bring myself to go back. I thought it would be better to leave than to have to lie to you again.”

 

They painfully looked at one another, reminiscing about how happy they were, how in love they were.

 

Sara quickly shifted her gaze to Nyssa’s hand still held in her own. “I was selfish. I knew that if I tried to say goodbye I’d never leave. My only thought was how to make leaving easier on me, but I never stopped to think about what it would do to you.”

 

“You were not selfish, Sara. I understand that you did what you felt was necessary to ensure the safety of your family.”

 

Sara sighed in frustration. Even after all these years, she was still incredibly angry with herself for everything she had done. Her rage had been sitting inside her, eating away at her mind for as long as she could remember, so she finally let it all go. “No, you don’t understand. I _was_ selfish. I waited months before I told my father that I was alive, and I only did it because he was in danger. Laurel and my mother were left to find out on their own. I let them think I was dead for six years and I didn’t even care!”

 

“Sara-”

 

“And I’m sorry. I’m sorry for leaving you without a word. I’m sorry for thinking you’d forgive me so easily. I’m sorry for making you wait so long. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I loved you when I knew I did. Most of all, I’m sorry I gave up on us when you never did.”

 

Tears filled up her eyes now, and Nyssa felt powerless to stop them from flowing down her face.

 

“Sara, you have nothing to apologize for. If anyone is to blame for everything that has occured in these past years, it is me.”

 

Sara sniffled and wiped her nose before asking; “What do you mean?”

 

“I told your father I would never let anything happen to you, and I did. I promised you that I would never allow the Lazarus Pit to be used on you, and I did. My marriage to Mr. Queen, whether my father orchestrated it or not, betrayed your memory. Everything that has happened since then is my own fault.”

 

“You and Oliver were… married?”

 

“In the eyes of the League, yes. When my father appointed Mr. Queen as his Heir, he decided to wed the two of us. I have since annulled our marriage with the use of a Horchis dagger.”

 

“Why did you let it happen? Why didn’t you stop it?”

 

Nyssa pursed her lips and found herself unable to meet Sara’s eyes. “As we were walking down the aisle, I found myself lost in reverie. I had dreamed of that day for nearly six years by that point, of that very same occurrence.  My father’s throne room, filled with fellow League members, the Priestess ahead of me, and you by my side. Everything about that moment was exactly as I had always dreamed of. The only difference was the anger flowing through my veins, and the person standing next to me. I was supposed to be happy, and it was supposed to be you.”

 

Sara looked up at Nyssa hearing the pain in her voice, and proceeded to reach for Nyssa’s other hand, taking them both in her own. She waited for Nyssa to turn and look at her, before whispering words so lightly they were nearly drowned out by the wind blowing past them.

 

“It was supposed to be us.”

 

Nyssa closed her eyes, relishing in Sara’s touch. The cars still rushed by on the street below, the stars still blazed in the sky, the city lights still shined on their faces. There was so much to hear, so much to see, but she didn’t dare open her eyes. Not now, when everything she wanted hear, to see, to feel, was right there in front of her.

 

They were both so lost in the moment, in fact, that they didn’t hear the footsteps coming from behind them.

 

 

 **Notes:**  

I was just on vacation and I sat outside on the balcony of the house we stayed in for a while and just listened to sad music and wrote a bunch of little Nyssara quotes/dialogue possibilities. I feel like I might have sacrificed a bit to try and fit some of them in here, so please let me know what you guys think of this chapter. Thank you so much for reading! I really appreciate all of you.

  
Also I was listening to this song on repeat as I was writing this and it's so good: [102 by Matty Healy from The 1975](https://youtu.be/5Z16SPic_TI)

 


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